Going to enjoy newly made space

One of the few George Carlin albums I don’t own is “A Place for My Stuff.” It’s kind of a surprise because the album’s title track is the one Carlin monologue I think of constantly.

“That’s all you need in life, a little place for your stuff. that’s all your house is — a place to keep your stuff. If you didn’t have so much stuff, you wouldn’t need a house. You could just walk around all the time. A house is just a pile of stuff with a cover on it.

“Did you ever notice when you go to somebody else’s house, you never quite feel 100 percent at home? You know why? No room for your stuff. Somebody else’s stuff is all over the (expletive) place.”

There’s plenty more, as the bit is around four minutes and I find those four-plus minutes more true with every day. I need more room for new stuff, and my amount of living space hasn’t increased. That means old stuff has to go somewhere.

Some of it goes to the trash bin in the alley. Some of it goes to charity. Some of it goes to coworkers and friends. I’m always a little more happy than I should be when somebody professes a need for something and I realize, “That’s in my stuff. I can get rid of it, and they’ll think I’m doing them a favor. Excellent ... why is everybody looking at me drumming my fingers together?”

Along the way, I’ve found the great loophole — stuff with storage. DVD collection overflowing? This entertainment center has plenty of drawers and cabinets. “The Simpsons” goes in the left cabident, everything from David Simon goes there.

Closet overflowing? That’s what the bedroom sets are for, with two drawers in the nightstand and six drawers in the dresser? Still need room. Get under-the-bed storage. Just don’t get impulsive about moving furniture for the rest of your life. It’s too heavy because of the hidden stuff.

The great loophole has expanded to the coffee table. One half of the storage goes to pillows and blankets, the other half to coffee table books.

I fear a day where the loophole expands to the bathroom. I feel like I’m only a few years away from a shower with drawers for all of the not yet expired medicine and toiletries that have outgrown their bathroom space.

But for now, I’m going to enjoy the space I’ve created for myself, albeit with furniture that’s too heavy to move. Now that the coffee table books are in the coffee table, that other shelf could hold a few more things.

Maybe it’s time I buy that George Carlin album I’ve been thinking about. Eh, probably not.

Kevin Wilson is editor of The Eastern New Mexico News. Contact him at:

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