Johnson: Children heavily impacted by pet losses

The connection between children and animals can be nothing short of magical — be it their lack of programmed perspectives, their pure, uninhibited approach to life or their inability to see differences, focusing instead on what they have in common — kids and critters can relate on a visceral level that bridges the human-animal divide.

This easy relationship lends itself well to the addition of pets in childhood, and children enjoy the company of their animal friends, often in different

In search of ponies

ways than others do.

Whether a pet is there first or comes along after a child, kids often gravitate toward them.

Many a toddler has followed the family dog on all fours, imitating their behaviors and even sampling their food, trying out the face-first method of snacking or by lapping from a water bowl.

Sounds too, are fair game to a developing child — meowing, barking or whining explored in a logical attempt to communicate with the family cat or dog.

Then there’s play, cuddling, and, as a child ages, the whispering of secrets into fuzzy and attentive ears.

Pets are, to many children, much more than they are to even the most attentive and loving of adult pet owners.

Cast into similar roles within the family dynamic — cared for, led and guided by their parents — it is only natural that to a child, the family pet is a sibling, and often by extension, a friend, companion and confidant who shares an experience in the household not unlike their own.

Yet the unfortunate side of pets is the all-too-short time they are with us and whether by accident, illness or even a full lifespan, still much shorter than our own, the death of a pet becomes an inevitable reality that children will experience.

While commonly understood that the relationship between child and pet is unique, and equally understood that grieving the loss of a pet can have profound impact on the human left behind, little has been done to explore what the death of a pet means to a child.

Children are impacted heavily by the loss of a pet, particularly when the death is untimely, for instance when a pet is hit by a vehicle and killed suddenly, according to a study conducted by a New York researcher.

To explore the significance of pet death for children, Joshua Russell, a professor of animal behavior, ecology and conservation, delved into the issue by conducting interviews with children ages 6-13 about their experiences and feelings surrounding the death of a pet.

Children, he found, have strong bonds with pets and see them as siblings or friends, not simply animals. When it comes to the untimely death of a pet, children are overwhelmed by feelings of unfairness, making it difficult for them to reconcile the loss.

However, they are largely able to accept the death of a pet who has lived a full life, Russell explained in a feature article in the research news publication Science Daily.

Russell's interviews also revealed children felt euthanasia was a moral way to end a pet’s suffering, in essence, establishing that it’s not death itself, but, rather, sudden and unexpected loss that’s most difficult for children to process.

And in all cases, he found, it was support and discussions with family and friends that helped children work through grief.

Friends, siblings and companions, pets hold a unique place in the hearts of children, and when a pet dies, it’s important to understand the grief may be more severe than for an adult, but with support and compassion, healing is possible.

Sharna Johnson is a writer who is always searching for ponies. You can reach her at:

[email protected]