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Dogs and I may all need a psychiatrist

I think we may be in need of the services of a doggie psychiatrist.

Having lived through the 13-year life of a truly whacked out Dalmatian, I never thought I would feel that way again but our four-legged family members have pushed us to the limit lately.

Things have only gotten worse since my last column about our pets.

One morning about 1 a.m. the creature that sleeps on my couch at night began to bark incessantly so I got up to check it out. He hadn’t gone outside so I couldn’t understand what was going on. Since he was barking in the general direction of the back yard I headed that way then I heard the hooting of an owl.

I opened the back door and Mr. Courage bolted past me onto the patio. Sure enough, every time the owl hooted the dog went crazy. I’ve got to admit owls creep me out a little but I’m not going to lose sleep over one talking in the night.

The little dog had his courageous moment when he treed my wife’s fake rabbit fur vest atop the bed. She was pretty sure some type of varmint had invaded her bed. I picked the noisy rascal up and tossed her on top of the vest. She almost came unglued at the seams.

The big dog has had a strange case of schizophrenia lately. One night he’s trying to sit in our laps even though he’s 70 lbs. One night he went back and forth between my wife and I trying to get in our lap.

The behavior peaked last Sunday during the Denver Broncos loss to the Kansas City Chiefs. I’m pretty sure it had nothing to do with my yelling at the TV set and telling Coach Kubiak what his next move should be. That’s just normal behavior for humans. Right?

Following that episode he spent two or three days outside in the back yard totally ignoring his crazy humans. I mean he didn’t come in for dog treats, food or water that we noticed. We would have called the vet but all seemed right except for the odd behavior.

Then, as suddenly as he had turned against us, he was back indoors wanting attention. He met me at the door with two toys in his mouth like it was me who had been away for 60 hours.

It makes you wonder just how our furry friends actually see the world. Most of the time they’re so much more relaxed and at ease than their humans but throw a rabbit vest on the bed and watch them turn manic on you.

If we go through another cycle like the past week I may need a therapist myself.

Karl Terry writes for Clovis Media Inc. Contact him at: [email protected]