Serving Clovis, Portales and the Surrounding Communities

The art of punching cows: Part 2

We’re back again to peel back the mysteries of the art of punching cows.

The Way of the Poking Stick is the most commonly practiced and is the most easily learned. At its core is the simple concept of extending one’s appendage influence by three to five feet with a stiff cane, stick, piece of pipe, or other similar construct that is formally known and referred to as a poker.

There is little mystery to the use of the poker. It is direct and straightforward. It is often applied as a broad wave of physical presence to one side or the other or as a stab of confrontational presence directly into the body of a particular, nearby member of the herd. It is effective, not too calm and not too chaotic, and it is easy to learn the basics.

However, while it gives the greatest amount of direct physical influence, it is still very little defense against a cow that is intent on running over you.

Don’t neglect your fence-climbing exercises.

In general, sharp, precise strikes to certain pressure points and special targets can momentarily distract or divert an agitated or incorrectly directional bovine. It can also be used as an extension of gestural manipulation and a walking assistance device after those incidents where your dodging and climbing skills proved inadequate to prevent a disabling collision.

It is the best introductory path for most and many will remain focused on this above the other techniques and eventually master the method. Those students are likely to be direct and disinclined to ever give any ground.

They will become effective, efficient cow-punchers, confident in their own ability yet aware of their limitations. They are unlikely to attempt a great feat of power and will always get the job done. It is neither a tool of retreat or aggression. It is not glamorous or mysterious, but is the most balanced of all the paths.

On a very practical level, it is, next to the open hand (which requires no external tool), the least requiring of a specialized weapon.

A stick, a stout kosha weed stem, a rebar post, an entrenching tool, or other similar linear extension that you can hold in your hand will work as a poker.

Audra Brown has poked a mad cow with a tree branch and won. Contact her at [email protected]