July 14, 2006 Amos

Editor’s note: Amos is a church mouse, unable to use the keyboard shift keys and unschooled in the art of punctuation.

A reader recently requested that Amos rerun his account of meeting Davy Crickett. It seems he decided to try out Willifred the white rat’s experimental tiny time machine. So Willifred installed his Tiny Time Traveler on Amos’ 1957 Cheeserolet motorized matchbox. The moment Amos climbed in, he found himself in San Antonio, Texas, in the mid-1830s.

the ballad of davy crickett

boss when i hit the ground i

was astounded by an

unusual sight — a bowlegged

cricket with a ratty coonskin

cap was twanging away on a

modified one-string ukelele

this is what he sang

born on a trash heap

in tennessee

a bug so poor in debt

and poverty

hopped from the heap

and into luxury

killed him a flea

when he was only three

dav-y dav-y crickett

bug of the wild frontier

went to congress

to save humanity

stirred up strife

and risked his dignity

went out west to

fight the bugs and fleas

then wrestled cobras and

made some history

dav-y dav-y crickett

bug of the wild frontier

he quit twanging on his

ukelele looked me up and

down and said what can

i do for you stranger

are you really davy

crickett says me a bit

incredulously

that i am son says he

suspiciously are you a

bill collector

no not me says me

i m just a little

wandering churchmouse

well i don t have much

to do with religion says

he ever since a gypsy

moth told me that church

would probably be the

death of me

i wouldn t take it that

way says me besides

church is not the essence

of religion — jesus is — and

he can set you free from

death fear and anxiety

what makes you think

so says he besides i m

not afeered of death

scorpions snakes or

anything

that may be true says

me but everybody needs

the peace and security

of jesus in their mind

and heart

he gives you life joy

and peace that even

throughout eternity

will never part

i ll have to think on

that some and give it

my utmost consideration

says davy and then

he picked up his ukelele

and started strumming and

singing again

dav-y dav-y crickett

bug of the wild frontier

boss i don t know if davy

changed or met jesus

somewhere along the way

but he must have overcome

his fear of churches by

the time he made it to

the alamo in eighteen-

thirty-six

amos

p s — see you next week boss

that is if i don t get caught

in some kind of time warp in

this tiny time machine

by the way willifred needs

to do something about the

size of this thing — it crunches

my tail and i come out with

more kinks than i started with