The Eastern New Mexico News - Serving Clovis, Portales and the Surrounding Communities

Articles written by Wendel Sloan

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Dolores 'was an incredible woman'

Dolores Penrod, 88, composed part of her own recent memorial at the Portales Cemetery. Read by retired professor Bob Taylor, Penrod — June 10, 1929-Dec. 11, 2017 — wrote in the third person:...

 

Teaching today beyond challenging

Even though we sometimes support different candidates, Sid Hicks and I have been friends since the hippie era in our small east Texas hometown. Our craziest stunt was hopping a boxcar on the spur of t...

 
 By Wendel Sloan    Voices    January 7, 2018

Scrabble a highlight of 2,000-mile trip

At Christmas, I got what I asked for: a garden omelet and pancakes. An unexpected bonus was a knitted toboggan from a Texas inmate who is almost a relative through a broken romance (not mine). The...

 
 By Wendel Sloan    News    January 7, 2018

In depth: The man with the band

CLOVIS — If you want to know about the character of retired Clovis High School Band Director Norvil Howell, ask a former student. Jerry Large, now a Seattle Times newspaper columnist, remembers the...

 

Resolutions: Here today, gone tomorrow

Mark Twain said of New Year resolutions: “Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual. “Yesterday, everybody...

 

Wendel's Christmas letter: Eventful year

During Thanksgiving I was given a room for the handicapped when I asked for an AARP discount at a Lubbock motel. After videotaping myself performing gymnastics in the shower, I was invited by USA...

 

Read and learn, space cadets

My book-of-the-month summary for December is “How the Body Works (100 Ways Parents and Kids Can Share the Miracle of the Human Body)” by Steve Parker (Reader’s Digest Books, 1994). The book is...

 

Social media decorum appreciated

Rarely do I post political opinions on my Facebook page. Once in a blue moon I offer my two-cents of data-driven defense for a poor soul being egregiously attacked by sans-facts gang-pouncers on...

 

Cuzins say don't steal bees' honey

Editor’s Note: “Dear Cuzins” is an advice column written by cousins Chef Juandel, The Anglo Mariachi Cowboy and Bootlegger Sloan. Cousin Wendel checks for libel. Deer Cuzins, Wit awl dis taulk...

 

Always amazed by well-crafted tales

Although the best fiction I’ve ever written is my resume, my lack of knack doesn’t stop me from being spellbound by wordsmith magicians birthing truth from lies. As young Navy spies in the...

 

'Bama Senate candidate a nightmare

Outsiders watching Alabama Senate candidate Roy Moore waving a pistol at a rally must have thought they were dreaming — or nightmaring. Ignoring past transgressions with his younger pistol, his...

 

Heaven, hell choices of TV enlightenment

Recuperating in Dallas the past week, I broadened my horizons by channel surfing to see what enlightenment I have overlooked with my busy High Plains sports schedule. Like a deja vu thunderbolt of...

 

I'm my mother's son; bullies beware

The approaching anniversary of my mother’s death at 92 on Nov. 7, 2010, makes me reminisce about our differing political views, and the traits I inherited or acquired from her while growing up in...

 

See screwed-up people as they are

My book-of-the-month summary for October is “Living Successfully with Screwed-Up People” by Elizabeth Brown (MJF Books, 2010 edition, 244 pages). The book offers coping skills for those...

 

Lessons abound in Facebook 101

Although I’ve been called a Facebook philosopher, it’s only an honorary title until I receive my Ph.D. (doctor of philosophy) from Facebook University (FU). I have earned an associate’s in...

 

I qualify to be Republican mole

It may seem incongruous, but I’m offering consulting services for Republican candidates. Since they already have corporate, Confederate, wealthy, gunslinger and Christian voters (African Methodist...

 
 By Wendel Sloan    Voices    October 8, 2017

Declare war on unjustifiable weapons

Some reflexive patriots, up in arms about blacks protesting experiences they’ve never endured by not observing rote rituals, ironically imagine they need military-grade weapons to protect them from...

 
 By Wendel Sloan    Voices    October 1, 2017

I missed a great party on my dime

Either someone recently used one of my credit cards fraudulently, or my alter ego is still a party animal. My last statement had a mysterious charge of $345.56 from a big-box store in Lubbock. The day...

 

Kids need to feel life to learn from it

My book-of-the-month summary for September is “Try and Make Me!” (2002, Signet, 242 pages) by Ray Levy and Bill O’Hanlon. Subtitled “Simple Strategies That Turn Off the Tantrums and Create Coo...

 

You know you're in Texas when...

Random thoughts: I’ve been in Dallas recently helping extended family stretched a bit thin. After escorting a great-nephew to kindergarten and back several days, I am convinced teachers deserve...

 

Even small trips are entertaining

Since exotic trips to Dallas, Albuquerque and Galveston are usually beyond my means, small trips become mini-vacations. Over Labor Day weekend, I traveled to Levelland in West Texas to visit Chance,...

 

Hey, Trump, why not try this speech

If President Trump promises to stick with the teleprompter, I give him permission to use this speech: My fellow Americans, green-carders and undercover residents keeping food prices and lawn grass...

 
 By Wendel Sloan    Voices    August 27, 2017

'The mice shall inherit the earth'

My book-of-the-month summary for August is “Non Campus Mentis,” a collection of college students’ answers on exams and term papers about world history. The 145-page book, published in 2001 by...

 
 By Wendel Sloan    Voices    August 20, 2017

Invocation for gathering is in order

Although not directly related to recent rumbles, this might be a good time for a universal invocation for gatherings on public property. Since mine does not beseech any specific deity, it should not...

 
 By Wendel Sloan    Voices    August 13, 2017

One good line deserves another

Following last week’s column about my 12-word memoirs, readers submitted theirs: • One thing I like is a good show — lightning struck; sound/flash. — Sheila Schelling • Norman Rockwell...

 

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